How Can I Keep from Singing?

The English language has, for once, failed me utterly. 

We have dozens of words and intricate turns of phrase to describe our misery, our longing; how do we describe happiness, except in cheesy glitter-crystal-twit terms that make readers roll their eyes?  I've always found happy people extremely annoying, and I think perhaps part of the reason is that the only words we really have to capture those emotions--whether the fleeting feather-touch of joy or the deeper long-term contentment so few of us grasp--sound trite at best and New Agey at worst. 

And so, to avoid the perilous shoals of the Isle of Cliche, I will refrain from trying to describe how great I've been feeling this past week.  I won't subject my experience to further analysis that might diminish or even kill it. 

Instead, I thought I would share some of the small practices that I have discovered lately, practices that are helping me hold on to my peace, in the hope that you too may find yourself at a loss for words as we fly headlong into this holiday season.

1 - Singing.  I sing constantly; in fact I am unable to stop.  I sing with the radio, I sing showtunes and oldies and Irish folk songs at my desk here at work.  When I am alone in Nature, I sit at the base of a tree and lift my voice in a wordless tribute to the day; all questions of being able to carry a tune in a bucket evaporate when there is no melody, no tune to begin with.  Lift up your voice.  Make a joyful noise, and moreover, let the joyful noise make you. 

2 - Prayer. Long have I advocated a life of constant prayer, but these days it comes far more easily.  I don't really have much to say to the Goddess except "thank You, thank You," and occasionally "Very funny, now where are my keys?"  But the important thing is that the conversation is ongoing, and that I am open to listen as well as to speak. 

3 - Significance. Live as if your every movement, every turn of your hand, is the turn of the worlds.  Imagine you are dancing through life; each time you reach for your coffee cup, you dance.  Feel yourself fully in your body as you walk down the hall.  Feel each muscle and tendon moving past each other, foot in front of foot, creating the miracle of motion.  Celebrate all the parts of your body that work just the way they're supposed to without pain or difficulty.  Obviously you're doing something right--you're alive, aren't you?  Every finger you lift has the potential to alter entire worlds.

4 - Sleep!  I've been going to bed earlier, and whether that's of my own power or with the aid of Better Living Through Pharmaceuticals, the difference in my mood and energy the next day is remarkable.

5 - Mantras and Affirmations.  I'm still an advocate of affirmations, and I find that the following help me through: 

I am open to the overflowing grace of the Divine.
Radiant health and well-being, within and without.
One way or another, all will be well.
Trust and take the leap, beloved; trust and take the leap.

Another thing I've found myself doing is mentally calling everyone "beloved."  I try to look at people as if we are kin, and as if that person--no matter who or where--is a dear and favorite cousin, niece, or nephew. 

6 - Patience. By the same token, I extend that sense of kinship and compassion to myself.  I was so prepared to be angry and depressed over my 30th birthday, so ready to rip myself apart for all my mistakes and failures, that I was almost doomed to have a terrible year just by default.  But then, thanks to the Goddess's unexpected intervention, when all was said and done, I looked at my life and thought, "You know what?  I haven't done so badly.  I have a roof over my head, I  have a car to drive, food to eat, my cat is provided for, I have a job that pays my bills, I have an iPod and a computer, books galore, friends who love me, a family who loves me, and God has my back.  I'm smart and creative and funny and powerful and have so much potential it's scary.  What the hell do I have to complain about?"  Now, when my mood starts to turn down or I find myself frustrated with myself (or anyone else for that matter), I try to treat myself with kindness, and patience.  "Beloved," I say, "it's all right if you screw this up.  So take a second and breathe, and think about another way to do it that you'll be more satisfied with."

I could go on for hours, but these are the most basic things that are keeping me, not just sane, but deliciously engaged, touched with equanimity and surrounded by calm.  I intend to enjoy this period of my life as long as it will stay with me, and hopefully take what I learn in this space forward, so that when the inevitable Suckage drops by to visit, I'll face it with new eyes, an open heart, and faith that the Goddess and God give miracles to those who court the miraculous.

Trust and take the leap, beloved; trust and take the leap.

Comments

[Sarah Peters]

Funny how I don't realize what I most need to hear until I read it on one of your posts: "Trust and take the leap, beloved; trust and take the leap".

I imagine this as the heart of a letter my future self would write to me, seeing my struggle now. It goes on: "If you knew the joy and abundance of good things that await you on the other side of this chasm; and knowing, you leapt with certainty and unclouded vision, then you would not have earned your wings".

Thank you.

[Angela]

Thank you for this post. It is wonderful, wonderful!

I just found out that my husband (who is a pagan therapist) has a copy of your book, Sacred Body. I am looking forward to reading it.

Blessings!

[Raven]

Hi, I wanted to also thank you for this post...I don't really have any thing else to say other then, thank you again!!

[Racu]

I'll be laughing my head off the next time some *bleep* cuts me off in traffic and I'm sitting there calling him "beloved."

Thanks, thanks so much...you ruin all my fun. ;)

[Karen]

Thank you, just THANK YOU!
Namaste

[Danmara]

Dianne~

THANK YOU for posting this. Seriously. THANK YOU.

I'm dealing with anxiety and depression right now, and I'm having a bad moment right now. You just made it a little better.

THANK YOU. *bookmarks this specific post*