Spiders and Snakes and Deer, Oh My!

I recently joined a LiveJournal community offering Pagan writing prompts.  I'm looking forward to the suggestions offered--since I solicited suggestions here, I've been compiling a rather long list of possible writing topics to keep me inspired.  (I still welcome suggestions, incidentally;  comment on this entry if you have any.)

At any rate, the first prompt on the community had to do with animal totems in Pagan practice.  It got me thinking back to the early days of my training, when "what's your spirit animal?" was a burning question and I noticed that an oddly large proportion of Pagans were magically paired with wolves, birds of prey, dolphins, and dragons. 

Oh, and cats--let's not forget cats.  At the first student Pagan group meeting I ever went to at UT there was a girl in the corner who claimed to be a "cat spirit" and spent the entire meeting licking her forearms.

I shit you not.

Whatever you may think of the idea of Otherkin or related states of being, you'll probably agree that's pretty damned silly, although not entirely unexpected in a college freshman who smelled so strongly of pot that walking within five feet of her made people crave Taco Bell.

When I first attempted a totem animal meditation, I hoped I would "get" a wolf or a raven or something else obviously Witchy.  Unfortunately, then as now, I was terrible at guided meditations--I'm skilled in leading them but not in undertaking them.  The meditation was a bust; in fact I think I fell asleep. 

Truth be told, since then I've never been all that into the idea of totem animals, at least not the way a lot of Pagans seem to be; I don't seek out a particular archetypal creature for guidance or invoke any animal spirits when casting Circle.  As I've said before I also don't deal much with my ancestors, either, while many other Wiccans do.  My path is less shamanic than it is mystical, I suppose.  (There being several basic flavors of Wicca--shamanic, ceremonial, and mystical, among others I can't think of at the moment.  Hmm...I should write about that, too.)

This does not mean that animals aren't an important part of my practice--and I don't mean from the perspective of veganism or animal rights, although that is certainly a factor in how much I adore pigs and cows.  What I have found is that although I personally don't have an animal, my gods do. 

Anyone who has read The Circle Within knows about Spider.  Spider, symbolically the keeper of written knowledge (who could forget Charlotte A. Cavatica, the greatest arachnid writer?), haunts the edges of my life when there's something specific that Deity wants me to write.  As my Goddess is a Weaver with the unive rse as Her loom, the symbolism is doubly significant.  I have Spider's image tattooed on my left shoulder blade, and I try to "live and let live" with her children in my house unless they're obviously poisonous.  (Part of the reason I got the tattoo was to make up for all the spiders I'd squashed before I realized they were trying to tell me something.  Pain and blood seemed to mollify her.)  Now, when I'm about to be hit by the Writing Stick, the tattoo burns.  In my opinion it's a much better system than me waking up in the middle of the night with an eight-legged emissary from the Goddess tap dancing on my forehead. 

More recently I found myself in association with another creature typically considered creepy and dark--the Serpent.  I blame Lilith; it's Her symbol, at least in the guise She has clothed Herself in to me.  The snake is, in many cultures and mythological systems, an agent of transformation, born of both Earth and Fire.  It's no coincidence that the Serpent in the Garden of Eden was Eve's tempter--a woman seeking knowledge outside the rigid strictures of Judeo-Christian theology has been considered a dangerous thing for many centuries.  Cultures that predated the Bible venerated the snake as a feminine symbol, so like many Pagan ideas it was absorbed into and vilified by the newer mythology.  Old news to most Pagans, but still significant when you find yourself dreaming of snakes.

In my dealings with Lilith, a goddess described as Adam's first wife who was banished from Paradise (and subsequently demonized) because she would not submit to him--or alternately as a handmaiden of the goddess Inanna, depending on who you ask--She described herself as the Serpent, who offered the apple of sensual wisdom and sexuality to Eve.  In Lilith's words, "I should have known she was not ready.  Are you?"

Therefore, when She informed me and my co-priestess that we were to get tattoos in Her honor, it was pretty obvious to me that She wanted a snake.  I do love snakes, actually; I would have one as a companion, except that they need specialized care and I'm a bit squeamish about their feeding.  I don't think Cosmo would especially like it either.  Someday, however, I may find myself sharing house with a ball python or similar.

When it comes to animals, there are plenty that are associated with the God:  wolves, goats, all sorts of predators.  As you might expect, this hippie cow-loving gal was not claimed by a god whose primary role is Hunter (although given His sense of humor I'm kind of surprised).  Mine is a dancing god, and a god of the forest, and whenever it pleases Him to appear with an animal, it's a white-tailed deer.

I've had a fascination with deer since childhood.  They're certainly plentiful, and in Austin at night sometimes you can see several hanging out in someone's front yard nibbling the shrubbery.  A lot of people consider them a nuisance, but every time I see one my heart leaps.  When I saw this picture I practically fainted with joy.  They are graceful, quick animals that seem to dance as they run through the woods.  Deer have been considered sacred animals for millennia, and god has been depicted with antlers all over the world; my favorite image of God Himself, the Froud card I've linked to here before, is antlered, not horned. 

The prominent item on my altar to Himself is a statue of two deer that I found in Mexico years and years ago; I found it on the corner of a shelf of cartoonish resin animals at the mercado in Nuevo Laredo, and when I bought it, it had...googly plastic eyes.  Yes.  I pried them off immediately, of course, and since then it's been a fixture in my living room.  Recently I acquired a fallen antler shed by a buck, and it too has become part of the altar.  Actual God statues are hard to find unless you're into Pan, someone else Greco-Roman, or like giant penises; I am quite satisfied with His creatures taking the place of an anthropomorphic figure.  He's something of a shapeshifter anyway.

That, then, is the extent of my involvement with the concept of totem animals.   Next week I hope to have more to say about Himself, as a great many people expressed interest in hearing more about our relationship. 

Comments

[Autumn]

Diane
This is a great post. I always learn so much from you!

[Michelle Wade]

It's funny to me how many people get hung up on animal totems. We forget the truth that ALL creatures are of the Goddess and wish for ones we think are "best". I got the shock of my life when mine showed up ~ it's a predator and I'm not what you'd call agressive. Our relationship has been...complicated. But anyway, thanks for reminding me...I should probably check up on him (yeah, it's a him too...weirdness times 2)

[Ali]

I have a "him," too!--a hare, who's a wonderful muse for my poetry, moon-gazing and flighty kind of productivity, but he does tend to get a little neurotic with too many people around. ;) I like to refer to him, affectionately, as my "gut-bunny." (Once, a friend, just trying to make a joke, asked if the invisible bunny on the backseat next to me had his seatbelt on, to which I responded in faux-astonishment, "You can see him too!?")

Growing up, I was particularly obsessed with frogs (even had pet frogs, which drove my parents crazy with croaking on warm nights). That connection has dwindled in recent years, though.

Never something "cool" like a raven or a wolf. :) But I'm quite fine with that. And anyway, hares have rich symbolic meaning in Celtic mythology, so :-p!

[Lisa]

I never had anything sterotypical or witchy cool either. I find, if anything, I connect with black-capped chickadees. They make a particular call in the spring that reminds me that "its going to be okay" no matter what "it" is. I don't know if I'd call them a totem but certainly a welcome messenger.

[Gaithel]

I remember being embarrassed because during one of my meditations on animal guides, a dolphin showed up. I didn't want to tell anyone.

I don't get dolphins anymore. I'm not sure how I feel about that.

[WR]

Some of my totems are the fire ant and the roach. Not the most stunning creatures on the planet but fasinating non the less. Can't say everyone in the pagan community is really a raven or a wolf or something so common. What I really like is asking them what kind of wolf, or are you sure it's not a crow or a hooded-crow.

[Danmara]

I also mostly see animals as representations of the deities. I have a couple of animals that I am personally connected to: the wolf seems to be my 'protective spirit' and the tiger is, well, me! :) But as for the others (Raven, stag, eagle), they are representations of the deities I work with (even though they are as much connected to me as 'my own' totems...or even more so.)

Loving that spider tattoo. :) I'm not sure what I would do if a spider goddess 'claimed' me. I have a phobic prejudice against spiders...(of course, now that I said that I'm sure one will appear. That's my luck.)

[Lady Jake]

My totem is Bear, which is in the cliche column I expect, but what can a girl do when her middle name means "Bear Spear Hunter" and, as little girl camping at Spirit Lake on Loo-Wit (aka Mt. St. Helens), woke her mother up with "mommy, the bears are talking to me!" ... i.e., snuffling around on the other side of the tent? Plus, I am a fiercely protective loner, too.

[Lady Jake]

Um, my middle name is Berengaria & it means "bear-spear CARRIER" ... just for the record!

[lactose intolerant lisa]

Awesome post! The first time in my life I ever saw a robin was on the day my partner and I got engaged. It was a family of robins, actually. There was a sprinkler going at our usual spot at the park, so we sat in a different place. Well, the robins were picking worms out of the wet ground and feeding them to their chirping babies; it was so amazing! We also saw them chase away a hawk. All of it was very appropriate for the occasion. We also saw a pigeon, which was meaningful to me since I was friends with a pigeon growing up. It was pretty magical. I haven't had any specific animals that I've worked with spriritually, but I've felt connected with many animals before. It's always so special to me.

Oh, and that deer picture nearly made me throw up with joy. :)

[angela]

Michelle Wade- i love rabbits and frogs too! what a silly combination huh! I always thought of horses as my totem animal, they were my first love of animals and they hold a lot of special meaning for me. The frogs I dont quite understand...maybe its their transformative qualities, the unique stages of development they go through and the fact that they can thrive on earth and in water and in fact need both to survive...I think I've always thought of them as spiritual messengers because they can travel through different realms of existance so easily. Bunnies I love! I have two of them! Rabbits have long been connected to the moon in celtic lore as you mentioned...ive always loved birds too for the air element they represent, and ive recently discovered that wolf is another of my totem animals. My resilient nature and fierce protector spirit. :-)

[Nico]

Great post! I've been a little confused at the whole phenomenon myself - both animal totems and Otherkin, despite knowing a few of the latter and reviewing the first book dedicated to the subject, the "why" of it continues to mystify me.

I've been a strict ovo-lacto vegetarian since I was a child, and I've a fondness for certain animals, but nothing I'd call a totem. Perhaps it's the city-dweller in me?

[Racu]

Okay...so I had no idea I was trendy...when I did my guided meditation (not the one you did, during which I fell asleep *coughs*), I was looking for a cat, too...cats being very special to me. But the cats stayed a good bit away (breaking my heart in the process). All sorts of critters milled about...but the one that kept coming back was a snake. She even told me her name, but I've forgotten it--bad witch!

[Ocean]

I never really bothered with totem animals, myself, until they started bothering with me!

My own was certainly not what I'd expect. I had been a little weirded out by everyone's obsessions with ravens, wolves, etc. like you said in your post. I didn't feel drawn to any animal on a spiritual level, really.

And then Dragonfly showed up. One thing I found funny was the fact that I never gave any thought whatsoever about dragonflies. Wasn't interested, and I only vaguely was aware that they existed. But nonetheless, Dragonfly images kept showing up and catching my attention, often once a day. It got to the point I was tempted to call upon the spirit of Dragonfly in ritual and just say, "WHAT, already????"

But since then, it's become a good companion and guide in my life, one that I've been thankful for, and one which I've worked with way less than I probably should.