Vegan MoFo Day 22: Beany Thing FAIL

See, not everything I cook turns out fabulously.  *headdesk*

Dammit.  I tried to get creative with a recipe and, to be frank, it sucked unattractive Republican pundit balls. 

See, if you're not familiar with the world of vegan cookbooks and blogs, there's this cookbook called Veganomicon which is by the two bestselling authors in the genre, hailed as High Priestesses among critter free cooks--and with good reason.  Their work is phenomenal.  My cooking, particularly my cupcakes, owes quite a debt to them.  So whenever you hear that a recipe of theirs is awesome, you can believe it.  Such a recipe is the Chickpea Cutlets, which sound repulsive but are actually a hybrid of a veggie burger and falafel.  They're toothsome and meaty, and like most of Isa and Terry's stuff, versatile.

I made the recipe straight up the first time and liked it quite a lot, although I wasn't completely pleased with the texture.  They came out a little tough, plus I hate chickpeas in any form except blended into hummus or falafel, and I couldn't get them mashed up enough like I wanted to without employing an electrical gadget.  So, I was reading on the forums about people altering the recipe and doing interesting things with it, like using different beans, and I thought, aha!  I'll use pinto beans and make them Mexican-inspired, and to make up for the softer texture of the beans I'll add extra bread crumbs to the mix. 

Well, that part worked just fine, in fact I was very pleased with the texture.  However, the flavor...not so much.  The straight recipe came out kind of bland, so when I made them with pintos I added extra salt...way too much, as it turned out.  Plus, I used the amounts of the herbs and spices in the straight recipe to base my measurements on with the Mexican spices, and it just didn't translate.  They were virtually flavorless.  I think part of the problem is that pintos are so much softer, they become a sort of paste, and break down so much they need more seasoning to taste like themselves, like potatoes do.  Chickpeas hold their shape a lot better. 

The original recipe used rubbed sage, soy sauce, paprika, and thyme; I kept in the soy sauce, which was mistake #1 (too much salt), and used cumin, oregano, and chili powder.  The combination was great but the amounts were way too low.  If I try it again I'll at least double the cumin and chili powder.

It's a damn shame.  Even covered in salsa they were just...not good eats.  It's really too bad I don't have a dog, or I'd try feeding what's left to the pooch, since I screwed the pooch on this recipe.

Yet I am undaunted.  I saw someone on the forum had made the cutlets with cannelini beans and Italian seasonings, and to me that sounds great--then I could have a sort of mock-chicken Parmesan, served with pasta and sauce, and mushrooms.  I think perhaps the Italian method would go better with the shape and texture anyway.

It's such an easy recipe, once you have the ingredients--the only hard thing to find was the vital wheat gluten, which any health food store, Central Market, or Whole Foods will have in the bulk section or in packages among their baking ingredients.  Even our HEB had it, but it was way more expensive than just buying a cupful in bulk--I'd never cooked with it and didn't want to end up saddled with a huge bag of something I hated.  But I'm excited now, because I'm not nervous about gluten anymore, so next stop for me is homemade seitan! 

I've got several recipes for the e-book that need testing, or that will once I get them put together.  If anyone would like to volunteer to test a recipe, please comment below and I'll send you one; report back on your results (if you can send a pic of the final dish that would be even better) and once the e-book is done, you can have your download for free. 

(Incidentally, it will also be free to anyone who has donated to Dancing Down the Moon in 2008--I never did get a chance to send out tokens of my appreciation to those who helped with Cosmo's vet bills and those who continue to help keep this site online, so I'd like to show my gratitude by saving my donors the five bucks I'll be asking for the download.  More details once I get closer to an actual completion date.)

Comments

[heather]

I'll test a recipe for you.

[amandarin]

I'll be happy to serve as test kitchen! But please don't send me anything involving poppy seeds (I'm deadly allergic).

[Sylvan]

Heather and Amandarin:

Thank you! I'd love your assistance. If you'll send me an email at diannesylvan at gmail dot com, I'll send you the recipes I have available for testing and you can pick which one you'd like to try.

That goes for anyone else who would like to volunteer; email me and I'll let you know what needs testing.

[Rose]

You might want to try garbanzo bean flour instead of crushing up your own. I made a pan fried tofu recipe using that flour for the coating (it was for an Indian fish recipe). Darn good eats. I'm going to try the Chickpea Cutlets recipe using that flour so if you don't want to risk it know I'll post about it in my personal blog for you.

When I make my first seitan I want to make it into Chick'n cacciatore! Related, I've found an organic faux chicken broth bouillon that just might be vegan. It smells a lot like real chicken bouillon, surprisingly. I'll be using that to boil the seitan in and see how it comes out... just as soon as I get my kitchen back in order. I'll post about it on my personal blog, too.

Rose

[Quizeen]

I'd like to volunteer to test as well, please.

[Katie]

I've had success using red kidney beans and using some faux beef bouillon with the recipe. It's so versatile!

[Pyrola]

I'd love to test your recipes! I'm totally new to vegan cooking, so it would be nice to try.